To my amazing daughter on the week she turns Eighteen,
I know you do not want the public attention, but you deserve it. This is a special year. Your mother and I are incredibly proud of the adult that you are morphing into.
In June of 2015, you asked me to take the training wheels off your bike and teach you to ride without them. I took them off and we went to the local park that has a flat loop around the ball field. I held the bike and we did a couple of practice starts with me holding on. You had a few false starts and a little problem getting started. You became frustrated, and that’s okay because you did not quit. I told you the problem was fear. You have to commit to going and do it. Within 5 minutes of us arriving, you were riding around the half mile course on your own. You took off smiling ear to ear. When you went the full loop on your own, you passed by me saying, “I love you, Daddy.”
This week the training wheels come off as you roll into adulthood. You will have a few false starts and maybe even fall. Get up, we will be here to help, shake off the fear and take off. Just be sure to come back around occasionally to tell me you love me.
I cannot wait to see what you do. I cannot wait to see the lives you touch and the world you rearrange, probably endlessly, until every piece is in just the right place. Yes, you will change the world. Or at least your corner of it. And knowing you, your corner will involve laughter, a few well-placed pranks, and a whole lot of people wondering what just happened.
You will always be my baby girl, but now you are an adult as well.
I love you more than you know. Your mom loves you more than you know. Your brother loves you still.
Still Dead, Still Here: Long Grief After Suicide. More at StillDeadStillHere.com.
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